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From: Rootem@aol.com
To: Ernie
Subject: Re: ADMIN: Let's Bring Em Home 2003

Ernie and lbeh.com,

I am betting that enlisted people volunteer to extend service time and volunteer to go to the Middle East for the extra money as well as patriotism. When they are paid MORE for time in Iraq why can't they afford to pay for their own tickets? Yes it's a nice gift to show appreciation, but I'm not convinced they need it or if all the money even gets to the soldiers. A side question.. when I joined the list about 7 years ago it was strictly jokes. I don't remember nearly as many bids for donations. "Send me money" blah blah.. People don't join joke lists to be begged for money. What happened to all the jokes??

Dear Michael,

You know, it's always nice and refreshing to get some feedback from my subscribers, especially when they present challenging ideas that have been well thought out and researched for accuracy.

But instead, I get some fucking idiot like you.

In my quest to expose you for the throbbing pusshole that you are, I will now annihilate your petty arguments, one by one. Behold.

1. "I am betting that enlisted people volunteer to extend service time and volunteer to go to the Middle East for the extra money as well as patriotism."

Well let me think for a minute before responding to this masterpiece... Ok I'm done. An infantryman received an extra whopping $300 a month imminent danger pay for being in Iraq. Yes that's right, for less than the cost of ONE of your semester hours at college, these fine people get the luxury of being shot at all month to the tune of an extra $10 per mother fucking day. Yeah that's sure as fuck worth it, eh? I've got a great idea Michael. What say you go down to your military base, let one of the guys hand you $10 and then fire pot shots at you all afternoon? What's that you say? The sight of a gun may you pee pee in your diapers and your mommy's not around to change you? Yeah, I thought so.

2. "When they are paid MORE for time in Iraq why can't they afford to pay for their own tickets?"

Gee, you're right. Because you know they're sure as hell not spending that extra loot they're pulling in on, oh I dunno, how about a fucking phone card to call their family once a week. Or a few extra pairs of boot socks. Or maybe that extra fistful of cash is being sent home to pay for day care since there's now only one parent in the household to be with their kids, you stupid fuck.

3. "Yes it's a nice gift to show appreciation, but I'm not convinced they need it or if all the money even gets to the soldiers."

So you're trying to imply that I'm pocketing some of the dough, is that it? That's a nice road to take, that's going to work out well for you, I can tell. Because when I list all the donations that come in along with posting a picture of my face, that's to make the FBI's job easier when they track me down.

4. "A side question.. when I joined the list about 7 years ago it was strictly jokes. I don't remember nearly as many bids for donations. "Send me money" blah blah.. People don't join joke lists to be begged for money. What happened to all the jokes??"

"Send me money blah blah?" Just where the fuck did that come from? Twice a fucking year I ask you to dig into that trust fund your cunt of a mother set up for you and donate to a good cause and you can't even do that, you greedy selfish piece of shit. But all that falls by the fucking wayside because Michael doesn't like it when the FREE FUCKING MAILINGLIST he's signed up for asks him every ONCE IN A BLUE FUCKING MOON to donate a few FUCKING dollars.

But ya know, let's take a minute and reflect upon what's changed in the past seven years. Well, New York City had ten million extra square feet of office space laying around for starters. Need a job? I hear the NYC fire department has a few fucking openings. Oh and there are 500 families here in the United States who have to buy one less Christmas present this holiday since their loved one has been killed in the line of duty.

Oh, and despite years of college you've managed to get fucking stupider and stupider, and lodge your head further and further up your pasty white ass.

Here's a clue, you bitch. If you're going to piss me the fuck off at least have the fucking brains to cover your fucking tracks first. Don't email me from a fucking website where I can

(a) look up your AOL profile and find your AOL home page... http://hometown.aol.com/rootem

(b) use that to find your home page at school where aside from having your pictures of your goofy fucking family, you expose such precious gems as, "My first job was DJ'ing at a skating rink." Wow you fucking party animal. http://www.alumnifriends.mines.edu/valued_supporters/phonathon_callers_98/root.htm

(c) and use that to get your email address at your college... mailto:mroot@mines.edu

I notice you like quotes on your web page, and this fruity little bastard caught my attention..."To rationalize love is to misunderstand it, to ignore it is to never live at all." -me

You little soft skinned bitch. Here's one you ought to try reading, if those big fucking glasses don't weigh your fucking down so much you can't get it out of your physics book.

"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feelings, which thinks that nothing is worth war, is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing, which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than him." -- John Stewart Mill (1806-1873)

You Sir, are a great big pussyhole and I wipe my feet on the doormat of your face.

Bonsai, motherfucker, bonsai!

Ernie "The Comet" Corleone.

ps - and everybody. If Michael wants jokes. Well, send him jokes. Make sure you forward him every mother fucking joke I've ever sent out, perhaps he's missed some.