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Ernie's House of Whoopass! November 8, 2016

November 8, 2016

I Don't Know Whether To Be Excited Or Horrified. or Both.

As you all know, I'm a Gary Johnson fan, and I think he would make a great president. But at the same time I have to be realistic about his chance of winning. That is to say, there really isn't one. And so I want to see Trump win. But before you have an aneurysm, hear me out. I want to see Trump win, but by a narrow enough margin where the votes siphoned off by the third party candidates come into play.

For the Republicans, they'll now be known as the party that put The-Guy-Who-Shaved-Vince-McMahon's-Head-In-Wrestlemania-XXIII into the White House. None of his crazier more hairbrained ideas will ever make it to fruition, as the Republicans spend the those four years racing to put one fire out after another, trying to make sure he doesn't cause too much damage. In essence, a Trump presidency will be a four-year hiatus in American politics and ultimately, this will force Republicans to offer up a better candidate in 2020.

For the Democrats -- specifically the DNC leadership -- they'll be faced with the cold hard reality that their hand picked candidate could not garner enough support to beat The-Guy-Who-Shaved-Vince-McMahon's-Head-In-Wrestlemania-XXIII. This will make them think twice about rigging the primaries and force them to allow the Democratic voters to choose their own candidate in 2020. And for us third party folks, specifically to the Libertarians since the Green party is only polling at 1%, this will earn us a seat at the debate table in 2020. So yeah fuck it, go Trump. Let's burn this bitch to the ground and start over.

Show me where men are fulfilling their traditional gender roles, by sitting on their asses and watching pretty women walk by.

But if you're thinking of movie to a foreign country to escape whoever gets elected? You may not know, but many hand gestures can mean very, very different things that what we're used to. That playful hand movement you do in the US may be extremely rude somewhere in Europe. So skim these GIFs and make sure you don't do anything you may regret on your next vacation. It'll be very hard for your parents to bust you out of jail from another country.

Show me where men are not fulfilling their traditional gender roles, by helping out with the laundry around the house.