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Ernie's House of Whoopass! August 25, 2014
August 25, 2014

Why Does Your Wife Keep Needing New Signs Hung?

Based upon the dimensions given in this aquarium chart, I suspect this is a 60 gallon hexagon aquarium. I know, why the fuck would anyone do that, right? Like what kind of fucked up logic would use to climb inside of a glass box and risk cutting yourself to ribbons.

The ALS Ice Bucket Challenge has taken off like wildfire in the last few week or so, raising lots of awareness and $50+ million in donations for the ALS research. More importantly, though, it gives us a lot of videos of hot women dousing themselves in water. So, take a look at these nine videos, which rank as nine of the sexiest on record, starting with Pitch Perfect hottie Brittany Snow, and ending with Anna Kendrick dressed all in white.

Old and busted: If it has tits or wheels, it will give you problems. The wnew hotness: If it has tires or testicles, it will give you problems.

You can learn a lot about life by observing another species. That's what Humphrey was told when he was first brought to Room 26. And boy is it true! There are always adventures in the classroom and each weekend he gets to sleep over with a different student, like Lower-Your-Voice-A.J. and Speak-Up Sayeh. Humphrey learns to read, write, shoot rubber bands, and much more. With a lock-that-doesn't-lock and an adventurous spirit, Humphrey's life would be perfect if only the teacher, Mrs. Brisbane, wasn't out to get him? With a fresh voice and an engaging, hamster's-eye view of school, families, and treats to hide in a cheek pouch, Betty G. Birney's book The World According To Humphrey will elicit laughter and a new appreciation for classroom hamsters everywhere.

Think you take your gaming seriously? The group behind the PLaystaion network DDoS attach forced American Airlines Flight 362 to divert because of a bomb scare. Take that, n00b.

Pictures of the corvettes they pulled out of the massive sinkhole that occured in the middle of the Corvette Museum in Kentucky this past year. Friends go there often and took these photos, the museum decided to display the once pristene corvettes as they looked when coming out of the hole . Greg

Like the mythical Greek hero Hercules, the Rottweiler is strong and true with a loving heart. Affectionately called Rotties or Rotts, the breed originated in Germany, where it was used to drive cattle and pull carts for farmers and butchers. That heritage is reflected in the Rottie's broad chest and heavily muscled body. When he moves, he displays strength and stamina, but when you look into his eyes you see warm, dark-brown pools reflecting a mellow, intelligent, alert, and fearless expression. A Rottweiler will play fetch for as long as they're willing to throw a ball, and the pooch'll make you laugh by cramming multiple tennis balls into its mouth.

Somehow I'm oddly comforted to know that my mother wasn't the only person to cut pizza with a pair of scissors.

Chester Bomar Himes was an American writer born in Jefferson City, Missouri, on July 29, 1909. He grew up in a middle-class home in Missouri. Himes attended East High School in Cleveland, Ohio. While he was a freshman at Ohio State University in Columbus, Ohio, he was expelled for playing a prank. In late 1928 he was arrested and sentenced to jail and hard labor for 20 to 25 years for armed robbery and sent to Ohio Penitentiary. In prison, he wrote short stories and had them published in national magazines. Himes stated that writing in prison and being published was a way to earn respect from guards and fellow inmates, as well as to avoid violence. In 1960 he wrote Run Man Run, which when translated to German, doesn't come out so well.

Check out this amazing scene as sea lions and pelicans beg and steal fish scraps at the fish market in downtown Puerto Ayora, Santa Cruz Island, Galapagos. The fishmonger you see appearing to choke the pelican was actually saving its life, by making sure it didn't choke to death on the fish head it stole.

Wow, Coors Light, Corona Light with a lime, and now shots of tequila? Boy she's going to have a hangover.


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