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Ernie's House of Whoopass! October 23, 2013
October 23, 2013

That's Right Little Buddy. If She Didn't Want It, She'd Wear Seashells.

I know what you're wondering. What kind of asshole would turn down a $93 million dollar offer for a fucking license plate? Answer: this guy.

And based upon what I can ascertain from this seashell identification guide these decorations are ZigZag scallop shells.

One of my favorite films of all time, Blazing Saddles is a 1974 satirical Western comedy directed by Mel Brooks. The movie was nominated for three Academy Awards, and is ranked No. 6 on the American Film Institute's "100 Years...100 Laughs" list. The film satirizes the racism obscured by myth-making Hollywood accounts of the American West, with the hero being a black sheriff in an all-white town. The film is full of deliberate anachronisms, from the Count Basie Orchestra playing "April in Paris" in the Wild West, to Slim Pickens referring to the Wide World of Sports, to the German army of World War II. Roger Ebert gave the film four stars and called it a "crazed grabbag of a movie that does everything to keep us laughing except hit us over the head with a rubber chicken. Mostly, it succeeds. It's an audience picture; it doesn't have a lot of classy polish and its structure is a total mess. But of course! What does that matter while Alex Karras is knocking a horse cold with a right cross to the jaw?" The film grossed $119.5 million in the box office becoming only the tenth film in history up to that point to pass the $100 million mark. and here, it's time for some with the one and only Mel Brooks.

Ummm, this might seem like a silly question and might be easier for me to understand if it were coming from a hot girl's point of view, but is this little dog coming or going?

Canada Dry is a brand of soft drinks owned since 2008 by the Texas-based Dr Pepper Snapple Group. For over a century Canada Dry has been known for its ginger ale, though the company also manufactures a number of other soft drinks and mixers. Although Canada Dry originated in its namesake country, it is now produced in many countries around the globe, including the United States, Mexico, Colombia, the Middle East, Europe and Japan. Canada Dry's popularity as a mixer began during Prohibition, when its flavor helped mask the taste of homemade liquor. In the 1930s, Canada Dry expanded worldwide, and from the 1950s onward, the company introduced a larger number of products including Canada Dry Club Soda, Canada Dry Ginger Ale, Diet Canada Dry Ginger Ale, and Canada Dry Tonic Water.

Dylan Fitzpatrick is from Toronto, Canada and she recently moved to Los Angeles to model. She was recently a finalist in the Playboy Intimates Lingerie Model Search, and she's been featured in FHM, American Curves and Muscle Mag. If you like beautiful and elegant brunettes, you're going to love this slideshow of Dylan. She shows off her incredible figure in some sexy lingerie and bikinis.

USA Today is a national American daily newspaper published by the Gannett Company. It was founded by Al Neuharth on September 15, 1982. The newspaper vies with The Wall Street Journal for the position of having the widest circulation of any newspaper in the United States, something it had previously held since 2003. USA Today is known for synthesizing news down to easy-to-read-and-comprehend stories. In the main edition seen in the US and some Canadian cities, each edition consists of four sections: News (the oft-labeled "front page" section), Money, Sports, and Life. According to the Audit Bureau of Circulations, the paper has 1.8 million copies as of March 2012 compared with The Wall Street Journal's 2.1 million though this figure includes the WSJ's 400,000 paid-for, online subscribers.

The Ferrari FF -- FF meaning "Ferrari Four", for four seats and four-wheel drive -- is a grand tourer presented by Ferrari on March 1, 2011 at the Geneva Motor Show. The body style has been described as a shooting-brake, a type of sporting station wagon/estate car with two doors. It replaced the 612 Scaglietti grand tourer. Ferrari states that the FF is the world's fastest four-seat automobile, with a top speed of 208 mph and 0 to 62 mph in 3.7 seconds. The FF costs US$300,000, with only 800 being produced during the first year.

Feral pigeons, also called city doves, are derived from domestic pigeons that have returned to the wild. The domestic pigeon was originally bred from the wild Rock Dove, which naturally inhabits sea-cliffs and mountains. Feral pigeons are all the same species and will readily interbreed. Feral pigeons find the ledges of buildings to be a substitute for sea cliffs, have become adapted to urban life, and are abundant in towns and cities throughout much of the world. Pigeons breed when the food supply is abundant enough to support embryonic egg development, which in cities can be any time of the year. Laying of eggs can take place up to six times per year. Pigeons mate for life, and are often found in pairs during the breeding season, but usually the pigeons are gregarious preferring to exist in flocks of from 50 to 500 birds, dependent on the food supply.

And for those of you curious after yesterday's convenience store gunowner story, the Ruger LCP he used is less than $100.

With one week to go, today I learned: there was a 2007 remake of Halloween and the cast included Malcom McDowell. Its budget was $15 million and it brought in over $80 million at the box office.

john and dorothy clelland certainly get my vote as one of the most amazing foster parents

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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