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Ernie's House of Whoopass! October 10, 2013
October 10, 2013

"Let Justice Be Done Though The Heavens Should Fall." -- John Adams In A Letter In 1777

The next revolution has humble beginnings.

Kickstarter is without a doubt one of the coolest, most revolutionary websites in the history of the internet. It allows smart, creative people without a lot of resources to bring great ideas to life through crowdsourcing, and it's kind of making the world a more interesting place with fewer missed opportunities. Unfortunately, for every ten designers or inventors trying to get their ideas out via Kickstarter, there is at least one rich guy thinking, "hey, wait a minute, I can use this to make even more money?" So today, I present rich people asking for money on Kickstarter. Not all them are douche-bags... cough...cough... Spike Lee...cough... but chances are every one of these project creators has a lot more money than you.

There are two basic approaches for a puncture or tear in the sail of a boat. The one generally used in a loft is called a cut-away patch: the damaged area of the sail is covered with new, strong cloth on one side of the sail. Then the damaged area is cut away from the other side of the sail, leaving a single layer of strong cloth with just an inch overlap at the edge of the patch. It is important that a cut-away patch have the threads aligned parallel to the original threads in that area of the sail. Otherwise, there will be distortion in the sail once it is wind-loaded. The second approach is easier at sea and quickly makes the sail functional again until it can be properly repaired in a loft. In this approach, the damaged area is covered with adhesive-backed cloth on both sides, sandwiching the tear within.

Spiral stairs wind around a central pole and typically have a handrail on the outer side only, and on the inner side just the central pole. Spiral stairs in medieval times were generally made of stone and typically wound in a clockwise direction (from the ascender's point of view) to place attacking swordsmen (who were most often right-handed) at a disadvantage. This asymmetry forces the right-handed swordsman to engage the central pike and degrade his mobility compared with the defender who is facing down the stairs. Developments in manufacturing and design have led to the introduction of kit form spiral stairs. Steps and handrails can be bolted together to form a complete unit. Modern spiral stairs can be made out of steel, timber, concrete or a combination of materials.

The phrase "Computer Graphics" was coined in 1960 by William Fetter, a graphic designer for Boeing. The interaction and understanding of computers and interpretation of data has been made easier because of computer graphics. Computer graphic development has had a significant impact on many types of media and have revolutionized animation, movies and the video game industry. 3D graphics became more popular in the 1990s in gaming, multimedia and animation. In 1995, Toy Story, the first full-length computer-generated animation film, was released in cinemas worldwide. In 1996, Quake, one of the first fully 3D games, was released. Since then, computer graphics have only become more detailed and realistic, due to more powerful graphics hardware and 3D modeling software. So let's take a closer look at the evolution of computer graphics over the last twenty years.

Hey Ernie, I can't seem to find the email addresses on EHOWA for submissions. I saw this truck driving around today, and thought I would share. Ron from York PA (Go BoSox)

I am helping a friend move his girlfriend from her mother's house to his home. After packing and loading her stuff up, we headed over to her aunt's house to visit. The aunt has a puppy that she had rescued. Since I do not really know anyone, the pup and I hang out while the girlfriend visits with relatives. The dog really seems to like me and they ask me if I would like to have her. Drawing from my past experience, I tell them I have to think about it. The puppy has some obvious deformity in its front legs and they live out in the country so I doubted the pup had ever seen a vet. That evening I get home to tell my wife about the pup and apparently, I was with in earshot of my 7 and 13-year-old daughters... I heard a "YES" just like this one 35 years earlier but this time it was in three-part harmony. Five days later, Grace was delivered to us. Grace is the dog's name. My children started to rename her Roo or Skippy but she only responds to Grace or Gracie; I guess she knows her name. Grace is a seven-pound Mini-Dachshund born with unsable front legs and is about 6 to 8 month old. She gets around better than you might think; she stands up by doing a little hula type move that pops her off the ground and on to her hind feet. She then hops and uses her tail to balance. I took her to my veterinarian and the good news is that Grace's over all health is good. The non-usable limbs are not causing any problems that would require surgery and the vet said she has adapted remarkably well to her condition. The main thing now is just keeping her from injuring her good limbs or her back and still allowing her to get lots of playtime and exercise. The bad news is that she has heartworms and apparently, it takes a harsh treatment to cure this. I'm still learning about this but have her scheduled for treatment Monday morning and she will be at the veterinary for about a week. We really love this dog and she really is remarkable. Still, let's see... $88.50 for the shots and checkup and $400 plus for the heartworm treatment... yep, $500 bucks. Please see pictures attached. David.

Wow, that guy in the pickup truck is fucking pissed. Meanwhile, on the other side of the country...

In early March, standing before a Colorado Senate, a rape victim testified against gun control by claiming she might have been able to stop her attacker if she had a gun. State Senator Edie Hudak used numbers from a pro-gun control group to counter the rape victim in front of everyone, "I just want to say that, actually statistics are not on your side even if you had a gun," Hudak said during the hearing. "And, chances are that if you would have had a gun, then he would have been able to get that from you and possibly use it against you. The Colorado Coalition Against Gun Violence says that for every one woman who used a handgun to kill someone in self-defense, 83 were murdered by them." The first effort to oust Hudak was scrapped after this year's legislative session, while gun rights activists focused on recalling Senate President John Morse and Sen. Angela Giron. In a close district, Morse was expected to be vulnerable, but political watchers in Colorado were surprised when Giron lost what was considered to be a safe Democratic seat. Hudak, who gained the ire of conservatives during the debate over gun control, is not in a safe district. "Recall Hudak Too" is the moniker under which a group will re-try to collect enough signatures to recall State Senator Evie Hudak. I can only wish that Clint Eastwood had been able to give some advice to Hudack's father before he got the itch to lay with her mother.

Given that the Chinese will eat pretty much anything that doesn't eat them first, it comes as no surprise that KFC has been very sucessful in China. But Taco Bell? Not so much.

Here is footage of Chad Reed's spectacular crash on the opening lap of the second 450 Class moto at the Lucas Oil Motocross Championship's Spring Creek National in Millville, MN. Reed had just assumed the lead, looking to take his fifth win of the season, when he bucked his bike right before a huge jump, sending him and his bike flying 30 feet through the air and crash landing on a hill., the world's first and only truly free adult megasite. NSFW.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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