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Yeah, So I Took Labor Day Off And Spent The Day Drinking Beer. Fuck You.

Pabst Blue Ribbon is an American brand of beer sold by Pabst Brewing Company, originally established in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, in 1844, but now based in Los Angeles. Originally called Best Select, and then Pabst Select, the current name came from the blue ribbons that were tied around the bottle neck, a practice that ran from 1882 until 1916. The beer experienced a sales revival in the early 2000s after a two decade-long slump, largely due to its increasing popularity among urban hipsters. Although the Pabst website features user-submitted photography, much of which features twenty-something Pabst drinkers dressed in alternative fashions, the company has opted not to fully embrace the countercultural label in its marketing, fearing that doing so could jeopardize the very "authenticity" that made the brand popular.

Obviously Ernie's Mother Didn't Eat Chicken Wings While She Was Pregnant.

American Tourister is a brand of suitcase founded by immigrant Sol Koffler in Providence, Rhode Island in either 1932 or 1933. He was determined to produce luggage priced at $1 in the midst of the Great Depression. The company's breakthrough came soon after when Koffler devised a new line that was significantly better than that of the competition; he named it American Tourister. In 1970, American Tourister launched a memorable ad campaign, highlighting the durability of its product by unleashing a "gorilla" (actually a man in a costume) on it. In 1993, American Tourister was acquired by Astrum International, which also made Samsonite luggage, and has now become a lower-end version of its Samsonite sister brand.

it's Tough To Dispute Advice Like That, Now Isn't It?

With stunning sunset views, good food and friendly atmosphere, the Buccaneer Beach Bar in Saint Maarten prides themselves on being a family friendly bar that offers a retreat for locals and tourists alike. Look out for their weekly special events and parties with great drink specials. On Friday and Sunday they are the place to be, as our special bonfire-fireballs light up the beach. The Buccaneer Beach Bar also offers a great venue for your next event. They accomodate both small and large parties. The Buccaneer is located right on Kim Sha beach with beautiful turquoise sea and white sandy beach to refresh and relax you.

With Every Remake, Hollywood Keeps Chipping Away At My Childhood.

So this morning I had the misfortune of watching the new Robocop trailer, and I really wish I hadn't. To be honest, this remake was something that I was hesitantly looking forward to: it's either going to be totally fucking awesome, or totally fucking lame. After seeing that trailer, I'm pretty sure it's the latter. Now I wish I coudl just bury my fucking head in the sand and wait for it to pass by. You see to me, the original Robocop is a timeless classic and should not, under any circumstances, be fucked with. Hitler doesn't even want to see it. But if you are going to fuck with it, do it right. Kind of like they did with Oceans Eleven in 2011. A remake sure? But a fucking awesome one. And one of the more underrated characters? Carl Reiner as Saul Bloom. Why anyone would want to see this Robocop remake is a goddamn mystery to me.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

Also: John Carpenter Was Banging The Big Titted Star.

So this weekend I spent most of Saturday sitting on the couch and going through some old movies. Well, when I say old movies I'm not talking Gone With The Wind, but more 80's stuff like Escape from New York.... yeah the one with Adrienne Barbeau. If you recall the glider scene -- shown very briefly at 0:55 in the trailer -- you have to remember this is way the fuck back in 1981 and there was no such thing as CGI imagery. The wire-frame computer graphics on the display screens in the glider were not actually computer generated, as computers capable of 3D wire-frame imaging were too expensive when the film was made. To generate the "wire-frame" images, special effects designers built a model of the city, painted it black, attached glow-in-the-dark tape to the model buildings in an orderly grid, and moved a camera with a black light through the model city. That's it. This cutting edge effect was done with five bucks and a trip to the hardware store and the model of the city set was repainted and reused for Blade Runner. Also, here's another tidbit of trivia: there's an opening bank robbery scene which never made the movie release.

Say What You Want, I Like The Fucking Guy.

So here we are about six months into Pope Francis' papacy and I have to admit, I kind of like the fucking guy. Sure he's got a little ways to go in regards to homosexuality and acknowledging sexual abuse, but the man himself seems humble, down to earth and genuinely interested in the well being of those around him. Soon after taking over, Francis refused the traditional luxurious apartment and instead elected to live in a two room studio. And then after using the traditional golden throne a single time, shoved that out the fucking door and now sits on a simple white chair. The guy cooks his own food and carries his own fucking bags. I mean seriously, who does that nowadays? I guess I'm saying he doesn't seem to be the pompous, self-entitled judgmental prick that his predecessor was.

These Blast Points; Too Accurate For Sand People. Only Imperial Stormtroopers Are So Precise.

For the most part, the city of Cape Coral is a pretty safe place to live. It's not quite as safe as where I used to live, but when you consider Cape Coral is the 4th largest city in the 9th largest state, we're not doing too bad. Especially when compared to other parts of Florida or even the rest of the country. As a whole, people down here are pretty relaxed; a good portion of the population are retired, everyone always has a frozen margarita in their hand, and who wants to get all pissy when the sun is always shining? But if there's one down side to that -- everyone always has a frozen margarita in their hand -- it's the crimes that come hand in hand with an endless supply of happy hour prices. I don't remember any DUI roadblocks up north, and I lived in Chelmsford for 13 years. Down here? They're every or every-other weekend. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, just a byproduct of the environment.

Now There's A Dress Code We Can All Get Behind.

I am not lazy. I am not lazy. So I just want you to know that, and I went on down to the library and did a lot of research before being forced to ask this question. I've looked through this entire list of German sausages... from bratwurst to weisswurst.... and didn't find any that ended with -RYWURST. Any ideas?

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

The NRA Has Joined The ACLU Lawsuit Challenging The NSA Phone Spying Program

Yeah, like that's going to fucking help. The NSA domestic spying program -- which is already breaking existing laws -- is going to be stopped by additional laws. Yep, sounds like a Gun-Free-Zone to me.

Happy Constitution Day, Bitches!

Here are Ben Franklin's thoughts about the Constitution, on the day it was signed.

No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, AND NO.

The legal definition of accidental is, "Something happening by chance; something unforeseen, unexpected, unusual, extraordinary, or phenomenal, taking place not according to the usual course of things or events, out of the range of ordinary calculations; that which exists or occurs abnormally, or an uncommon occurrence." To that end, I don't think that pulling the trigger on a firearm and having a bullet come out is unforeseen, unexpected, unusual, extraordinary, or phenomenal.

Open Carrying Your AR Just To Get Attention Is Like Twerking.

Starbucks has always been -- and I hesitate to say pro-gun, but I'll certainly say not anti-gun -- about their firearm policies. They simply said, we refuse to outright ban firearms from our store, instead we defer this to local statutes; you can come in armed just so long as you're complying with local laws. It was fair, it was honest and it should have been the end of it. And there are a bunch of folks out there who called it several weeks ago. They said these Starbucks Appreciation Days were going to undo us all. To not take Starbuck's neutrality on guns as choosing either side in the debate and that by showing up at their stores armed to the fucking gills, Starbucks would ultimately be forced to choose sides. And I don't think this recent change in Starbucks' firearm policy is in response to any anti-gun push, but more backing away from the zealots who are way too over the top in their protests. If we in the gun community are unhappy with how the axe has fallen -- don't blame this on the anti-gun crowd, no. We have no one but ourselves to blame. I mean seriously, just because your state has open carry and you can legally carry your AR into Starbucks for a caramel macchiato, doesn't mean you should. Or as someone else wrote on my wall once, "just because it's legal doesn't mean you're not an asshole."

Are You Telling Me That You Men Finished Your Training On Your Own?

If you go out on the water at all, it's a good idea to know how to operate a boat throttle. It's a fairly simple process. You have only two gears, forward and reverse, so you don't have to worry about shifting gears. On most boats, the throttle consists of one or two levers connected to the engine by cables. Start with the throttle in the middle (neutral) position, with the lever arm straight up. The engine should be idling with the transmission in neutral. Slowly push the lever forward to engage the forward gear. The further you push the lever, the faster you will go. To slow the boat, pull the lever back. To stop the boat, pull the lever back to the middle position.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

Jesus, The Kid's Got A Goddamn Helmet On, What More Do You Want?

Rocky Lockridge is an American former boxer. As a professional, he is best known for handing Roger Mayweather his first defeat—a first-round knockout after just 98 seconds—earning him the WBA super featherweight championship. For the past two decades, Lockridge has suffered drug problems and became homeless after a stroke forced him to walk with a cane. Lockridge recently had a comeback fight against an unknown opponent in an open air venue. The fight was sponsored by Rockstar Energy Drink and featured plenty of pre-fight smack talk by his opponent. Rocky won by KO in the first round, knocking the larger, unskilled fighter down and out with the first shots thrown. That's a lot of red, although decidedly less gruesome than a Mortal Kombat fatality.

That Totally Looks Like Squidward. Totally.

Fernet Stock is a herbal bitters made in the Czech Republic and in Trieste, Italy. It is flavoured with approximately 14 herbs, imported from the Mediterranean and the Alps. Fernet Stock's popularity only increased through the 1960s and 70s, and following the Velvet Revolution, its sales increased dramatically. It is also available in a sweeter form as Fernet Stock Citrus, launched in 1997. The original Fernet is approximately 40% alcohol (Italian version 41%), whereas the Citrus is a lower 30%.