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Aw Jeff, Don't You Never Turn Your Fucking Back On A Clown When She's Talking To You.

From the If-We-Had-More-Of-This-Then-This-Shit-Wouldn't-Happen Department: Teen Mom is a reality television series which aired until August 2012 on MTV. It follows the lives of four girls from the first season of 16 and Pregnant as they navigate their first years of motherhood. One of those stars, an aspiring model named Farrah Abraham, is the mother of Sophia whose father, Derek Underwood, was killed in a car accident two months before her birth. Farrah sees a therapist to discuss the rocky relationship with her family, as well as dealing with her emotions regarding Underwood and his death. She published her autobiography, My Teenage Dream Ended in August 2012 and a year later, plunged into porn... here's a VERY NSFW preview of her first film. You're welcome!

By the way, that student's name is Jeff Bliss and his school district is giving him shit over calling his teacher out for doing such a shitty job. Personally, I applaud Jeff and say GIVE EM HELL, kid. Without a quality education you're never going to get into medical or even veterinary school.

What's that? One Wipe Wonders didn't make this list? Because it's BILLY FUCKING MAYES here with 9 infomercial products that every man should own.

And I'm gonna have to be taking your car today. See I have some top secret clown business that supersedes any plans that you might have for this here vehicle. [mutual laughter] What's that about clown business? [nervous laughter] Do I stutter, bitch? Ha! My absolute favorite scene from The Devil's Rejects.