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Ernie's House of Whoopass! April 11, 2012
April 11, 2012

More Of The Same, No Matter Which Way You Vote: Obomney In 2012!

At this point, I don't think the coming elections are going to bring any real change to the political landscape. Either way we, the American voter, are going to get fucked.

Yesterday I mentioned the USS Yorktown (CV-8) but I neglected to mention the newer USS Yorktown, a Ticonderoga-class cruiser in the Navy from 1984 to 2004. In February 1988, the USS Caron operating with USS Yorktown, entered Soviet territorial waters limit in the Black Sea off the Crimean Peninsula. Under international law, this act could be permissible if the ship was progressing from one point in international waters to another point in international waters via the shortest course possible, but according to the Soviet Union, it was the right of the USSR to authorize or prohibit travel in selected areas within the 12 mile limit. The United States however did not recognize the Soviet's claim in this case. On this occasion, Caron had onboard a ships signal exploitation spaces system, operated by a crew of 18 in support of the U.S. National Security Agency. This system was capable of recording data on Soviet defense radars and communications. In response, the Soviets deployed a destroyer and a Mirka II class light frigate as well as many other Soviet Navy, Coast Guard, KGB and "civilian" ships to intercept the U.S. ships. Soviet aircraft continuously buzzed the Caron and Yorktown as smaller vessels weaved to and fro in front of the American ships. Several times, Soviet vessels and aircraft obtained radar lock on the Caron and Yorktown. Both American ships maintained a constant course and speed throughout the incident. Eventually, the Soviets lightly rammed both ships (USS Caron - USS Yorktown). No significant damage resulted to any of the ships involved.

And despite what they showed us in the final battle of Top Gun, shit don't go down like that. On January 4, 1989, near the Libya coast, Two F-14s from the USS John F. Kennedy were alerted to a pair of Libyan MiG-23 Floggers, which had taken off from Al Bumbaw Airfield. The F-14 Tomcats locked the MiGs with their powerful AWG radar. Normally such a radar lock resulted in the MiGs retreating back to Libya, but not this tme. During a lengthy six to eight minute air battle, the MiGs continued to threaten the Tomcats with AA-7 Apex missiles and finally, after several attempts to evade the MiG radar threat, the incoming pair of MiG-23s were declared hostile and the F-14 crews were cleared to engage. The crew of the lead F-14A, fired an AIM-7 Sparrow missile which missed, while the second F-14A's AIM-7 missile found its target, destroying one of the MiG-23s. The lead F-14 re-engaged the remaining MiG-23 firing an AIM-9 Sidewinder heat-seeking missile which detonated in the tailpipe of the MiG. Both MiG-23 pilots ejected safely from their destroyed jets. No future Libya MiG-23s ever engaged another U.S. Navy F-14 Tomcat.

Let me lay it out there, that I have an affinity for attracting crazy people... but here is the nut: My landlord is a crazy person and I need an affordable and reliable way of monitoring what goes on in my apartment while I am gone. I have a Macbook Pro. How can I monitor traffic in and out of my house and save it to my Lacie drive for use in my future defense? - Anonymous Female Reader

Well, I ain't no Mac guy. So who's got ideas to help a little lady out?

"Anything You Can Do" is a spirited duet, with one male singer and one female singer attempting to outdo each other in increasingly complex tasks. In the musical 'Annie Get Your Gun', the song sets the scene for the climactic sharpshooting contest between Annie Oakley and Frank Butler. Its most memorable lines are, "Anything you can do I can do better; I can do anything better than you." The song was first performed in by Ethel Merman and Ray Middleton. Keep in mind that Annie Oakley was an American sharpshooter and exhibition shooter. Born Phoebe Anne Moses, she had to shoot because she needed to put food on the table after her father's death. By the time she was a teen, she'd entered and won so many shooting contests that she was banned from entering many of them. Oakley's amazing talent and timely rise to fame led to a starring role in Buffalo Bill's Wild West show, which propelled her to become the first American female superstar. Oakley's most famous trick is perhaps being able to repeatedly split a playing card, edge-on, and put several more holes in it before it could touch the ground, while using a .22 caliber rifle, at 90 feet. Oakley continued to set records into her sixties, and she also engaged in extensive, albeit quiet, philanthropy for women's rights and other causes, including the support of specific young women that she knew. With that in mind, Red Bull City Scramble created one of the most technical and challenging Enduro-cross tracks in New Zealand. Chris Birch gives us an inside look at the innovative track, and the obstacles the competitors will encounter. On the flip side, here is the X-Games Women's MotoCross Rally. I'm just sayin.

Epic Cleavage is fast becoming the most popular gallery series I've linked to, and it's not hard to see why. There's something very powerful about some well applied cleavage that even complete nudity can't match. Anyone who who works in an office where someone comes in with a low neckline can attest to that fact. This is the third volume of epic cleavage, and it's definitely the best so far. See if you agree.

Thanks for RPG post -- I'm tired of watching movies repeatedly that show guys firing bazookas, RPG's, LAW's etc, out of huts, cars, crowded spaces etc.... It sort of ruins scenes for me and other people in the theater when I yell, "Aww man that's bullshit". Ranger Steve

Eric Holder says voter fraud isn't a problem. So this guy goes to his polling place and says he's Eric Holder and gets offered his ballot. Later on the video the guy goes to the DOJ building and asks if he needs ID to enter and is told yes. Jon

Ernie, this would appeal to your engineering/money saving mind. (OMG you’re a Jew! That’s why you moved to Florida!) I doubt the “engine of the future” claims, but it seems cool. Best regards, Marty

Samuel Burl Kinison was an American stand-up comedian and actor, known for his intense, harsh and politically incorrect genre humor. A former Pentecostal preacher, he performed stand-up routines that were most often characterized by an intense style, similar to enthusiastic preachers, punctuated by his trademark scream. On April 10, 1992, Kinison died after his white 1989 Pontiac Trans Am was struck on U.S. Route 95, four miles north of Interstate 40 and several miles west of Needles, California, by a pickup truck driven by a 17-year-old male who had been drinking alcohol. An autopsy found that Kinison had cocaine in his system at the time of his death. Kinison is interred with family members at the Memorial Park Cemetery in Tulsa, Oklahoma. His grave marker includes the unattributed quote, "In another time and place he would have been called prophet."

Barcelona may be ranked as the world's best soccer club but when it comes to the sexiest female fans and ex-girlfriends, the Catalans rivals Real Madrid are the cream of the proverbial crop. I'm not quite sure what's in the water over there in Spain, but the women who are, or have been associated with current Los Blancos players are certainly a sight for sore eyes. So let's get right to it. Here are the 20 hottest women associated with La Liga's Real Madrid, and for the time being, the second-best club on the planet.

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